A Grammar and Dictionary of Liqupa

Compiled by Captain P. Q. Stovepipe

Since the Great Blue Falling Out, the Guardian Pines of the isle known locally as Kasicinala have permitted no outsiders to set foot on shore. This means that no clear estimate of the number of speakers of Liqupa is available to linguists. However, aerial photography seems to indicate that the population of the island must be between 5,000 and 10,000. Liqupa legend holds that there are always 6,912 Liqupans, but this number cannot be varified, and the Liqupans themselves are notoriously difficult to count since they do move about so.

Their island is located in the Caribbean, off the southern shore of Puerto Rico but does not appear on most commercially available maps.

The community was once very accepting of outsiders, but closed itself entirely away from Western influence in the fall of 2,000. The reasons are not entirely clear, but seemed to have involved a terrible cultural misunderstanding between the people of the island and a young, idealistic linguist with adorable children now living, for some mysterious reason, in Northwest Ohio. Working diligently and under incredibly difficult field conditions, previous attempts to document the language met with failure as the would-be documentarians always seemed to become confused and distracted and had difficulty organizing their thoughts, writing grammatically, and filing paperwork on time.

Liqupans are a pastural, communal, highly synesthetic people whose village life centers around pine tree worship, folk music and the telling of fanciful stories.

A usual greeting is "What color do you have today'. this reflects the Liqupans synesthetic experience of emotional states as colors. The response is either a prfunctory 'I have red' (the color of happiness), 'I have green' (the color of tranquility) or 'I have all pretty colors'. A typical leave taking is 'go with the pine trees' a wish for peace and continued tranquility or 'remember the blue' a warning to stay safe.

Updated 3/31/2010